purpose

By on October 18, 2010 in Quick Wisdom

I sit at the table, waiting for my meal.  I have a bib on, a bucket near by, and instructions printed on the paper placemat in front of me.  To me it’s a weird setup, but to the Bostonians around me it’s perfectly normal.  Finally, my meal arrives.

It’s a boiled lobster, still in tact from how it was taken from the sea, the only addition being rubber bands on its claws and having been boiled for 13 minutes.  This is my first experience eating a full lobster, and likely my last.

It’s not that I had a bad experience but that I’m just not that big a fan of seafood.  To have to follow instructions on how to eat something (8 steps!), to have to pinch this, snap that, tear this, drain that, just seemed like additional work.  But to people who love lobster, all the work I’m complaining about is part of what they enjoy about the experience.  The 8 steps are worth the pay-off of eating fresh lobster–the bib and bucket are essential pieces of equipment for a delicious meal and the process just makes the end result even better.  To me, it’s all extra work.

And that’s the difference between people who are overworked and passionate about what they do.  If you don’t like the end result of what you’re doing, any extra hours are stressful and added responsibility is a burden.  But if you love what you do, the extra work only makes the results better and more responsibility is exactly what you want.  So discover your lobster, put on your bib, and start enjoying what you do.

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By on January 31, 2010 in Learn with Humor

“Life imitates art far more than art imitates Life” – Oscar Wilde

photo by weatherbox

Though the art/life debate is similar to that of the chicken/egg, I am a firm believer that much can be gained from taking a look at art to reflect on our life (take the “What I Learned From” series for example).  With that in mind, I also believe that many of the tips that make us better artists, also make us better people.

So I present here 10 life tips I learned from improv classes at the Upright Citizen’s Brigade Theater.

1. “Dare to be dull.”

When most people start improvising, they think they need to create crazy characters and wacky situations to be funny.  But the reality is that comedy comes from truth–it doesn’t need flashing lights or fancy fog machines.  The same is true when it comes to certain work and life situations.  Success isn’t about getting the newest gadget (aka the flashing lights); success comes from hard-work and planning, which might be viewed as dull, but it is effective.

“A well-managed factory is boring.” – Peter F. Drucker

2. “Make a connection with the other player.”

Improv is a team-sport, as are work and life.  To have a successful improv scene, you must connect to the other player and focus on your relationship.  It’s easy to forget about this when performing on a stage in front of people, and just as easy to forget when trying to make a sale or talking to our significant other.   But life is about relationships and connections, not material objects or status.

“Only a life lived for others is worth living.” – Albert Einstein

3. “Make it about the present.”

To see two characters reminisce about their history or to talk about future plans is boring to the audience–we want to see them act now.  Life is the same way, except we’re the characters.  Too often we are caught up in one happened awhile ago or what we should plan for, and we completely ignore the present, the now.  By focusing on the now we start to take control and experience life, instead of missing it.

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making plans.” – John Lennon

4. “You have to understand why you’re playing that game.”

As an improviser, one of the most important qualities you have to reveal as your character is your motivation.  Why are you doing what you are doing? This question is equally valuable in every day life–what is your motivation for doing whatever it is you are doing? If you ask yourself this about everything, you’ll realize there’s a number of things that you do out of habit or because it’s a societal norm that you aren’t really motivated or excited to do.  Stop them.

“If a man hasn’t discovered something that he will die for, he isn’t fit to live.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

5. “Never expect a certain answer or reaction.  Just listen and react to what was actually said.”

Our education system has taught us to listen to react–to start to formulate an answer for the question our teacher is asking us, before she’s even finished asking it.  The problem is that in meetings and conversations, we stop listening once we think we know what someone is going to say because we start thinking about our response–often missing the true point of what is being said.  If you want to be a better communicator, stop assuming you know what is being communicated and start listening to what is actually being said.

“Seek first to understand, then to be understood” – Stephen R. Covey

6. “Make your fellow players look like geniuses.”

When you treat other people like geniuses, you’ll often find that they are.  Too often we look at what mistakes people have made instead of seeing what they’ve done correctly.  When you look for the positives and build on successes, your team (or family) can achieve far better success both as individuals and as a team.

“Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can be and should be and he will become as he can and should be.” – Goethe

7. “It doesn’t matter what you’re doing on stage, as long as you sell it.”

This is known as the “Karaoke Rule”–you don’t have to be the greatest singer to be good at karaoke, you just have to sell it.  If you don’t, people will pick up on your  nervousness and you’ll lose them as an audience.  So whether you are standing in front of your managers giving a presentation or about to belt out the words to Bohemian Rhapsody, you’ll find much better success by giving it your all and selling it.

“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.” – Mark Twain

8. “Be more brave than impressive.”

When I first started performing improv, I thought I always had to try to come up with the wittiest thing to say or add wordplay or puns to get a laugh (hey, I enjoy puns).  While wit can be funny, it’s not what entertains the audience–bold choices are.  What you’ll soon find out is that being bold is what makes you impressive, regardless of what you are doing.

“Whatever you do or dream, you can begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” – Goethe

9. “Just make a choice.”

Ambivalence and timidness are the death of an improviser on stage.  Since everything is made up, you just have to make a decision and go with it.  Once you make a decision, it’s up to you and your scene partner to go with it and make it work.  In life, we don’t get things done because we haven’t decided what we want, and until we do, we’ll never be able to achieve it.  Make a choice, that’s the start.

“The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.” – Ben Stein

10. “When in doubt, have fun.”

Sometimes, before a big show, I make sure I remind myself that improv is fun–that’s why I do it.  I step on stage to have fun and entertain others.  So when I’m in a scene and I’m not sure what else to do, I do what is fun; I play games, I make interesting choices, and I enjoy myself.  Because in improv there is no right or wrong, just fun.  By now you should know what I’m going to say–life is the same way.  Excluding immoral / illegal activities, there is no wrong in life, only what you choose to make it.  So when in doubt, choose fun.

“People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” – Dale Carnegie

“Seek first to understand, then to be understood” – Stephen R. Covey

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By on January 14, 2010 in Quick Wisdom

According to the Mayan calendar, the world is ending in 2012.  I don’t believe that it’s actually going to happen, but what if you knew for sure that it would?  What would you differently? Would you stay at your current job? Would you spend as much time watching TV?  Would you try to eat as much Chick Fil-A as possible (I would)?

Excluding the last one, the above questions are all worth asking yourself right now.  Because if the world ends in 2012, you’ll want to make the most of the remaining 2 years.  And if it doesn’t, then you’ve still just made the most of the last 2 years.

The point is that if you would change your life drastically knowing you had only had 2 more years to live, then maybe you’re doing something wrong (within reason of course, don’t go spending all of the money in your savings account or testing the limits of the law).

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By on May 5, 2009 in Learn with Humor
Photo by ayeyah

Photo by ayeyah

I recently posted an article called Creating a Sense of Urgency that talked about how to be more productive by creating a sense of urgency for yourself to get things done.

In the comments, someone asked why I was encouraging more stress, and what I meant by saying “stress isn’t always a bad thing.”  This is what I meant:

The Stress of Working Out

Exercise and working out is the practice of stressing your muscles and body in the attempt to make them stronger.

While you’ll (hopefully) never have to run 26-miles consecutive miles, half a million people run a marathon every year for the purpose of training their body (and accomplishing an amazing feat).  And while you can push too hard to the point of injury or death, by applying the right amount of stress, you can become stronger and healthier.

The Stress of Working

Just as stress is what makes our bodies stronger, the same is true for work–it’s just a different type of stress and a different skill-set that we’re making stronger.  Whereas exercise stress strengthens our muscles and capacity to lift weights or run, work stress strengthens our brain and capacity to get things done.

But just like exercise, overdoing it with work stress can have just as bad of side effects.  Too much stress, or chronic stress, can result in memory problems, lead to depression, or even cause chest pain–certainly not positives.

The Right Amount of Stress

For both exercise and work-related stress, the key to growth and development is in applying the right amount of stress.  What’s the right amount? 92.6 minute of stress per day… I’m kidding.

The right amount of stress can’t be measured exactly and is different for every person.  And while there isn’t an exact science, there are a few guidelines to managing stress:

  1. Push Yourself
    Almost all of the benefits of exercise come at the end of the workout, when you are pushing yourself past what you’ve accomplished before.  The same is true for stress–you will grow your capacity to do work by pushing yourself to work better and more efficiently than you have in the past.
  2. Rest and Recuperate
    The most important time for muscle growth is the recuperation period.  While it’s important to stress your muscles, it’s even more important to give them ample time to rebuild and get stronger.  The same is true for work–if you are constantly stressed-out, you don’t give your body and mind the time to recuperate and grow stronger–instead it has the opposite effect.
  3. Provide Fuel
    Eating right is crucial to seeing gains (or fat loss) in your workouts.  While you will see some positive health effects simply from working out, when you combine it with a healthy diet, you really see the benefits.  Work is the same way, but fuel here isn’t just a healthy diet: it’s exercising, relaxing, taking strategic breaks, and having a strong sense of purpose.  They will all help to fuel you through your work.

Manage Stress for Improvement

Stress isn’t a bad thing.  In fact, it’s absolutely necessary to becoming more efficient, productive, and effective.  The key is managing stress in such a way that it helps you grow and improve, but doesn’t impact your work, life, or health negatively.

To do this, like with exercise, you want to systematically increase your capacity to deal with stress.  Our body and mind grow through increased stress, not continual stress–that means to push ourselves further, but to still take breaks, to re-charge, and to provide the proper fuel.

Why Stress Isn’t a Bad Thing

So if we hope to improve our productivity and ability to work over time, stress is a must to push us past our current ability–and that’s why stress isn’t a bad thing.

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